Honestly, it’s not like I couldn’t have predicted this.
This whole blog was started as an exercise to combat my worst tendencies as a creative: 1.) perfectionism and 2.) freezing up with indecision whenever anything I make doesn’t meet my highest standards. I wrote a few nice essays, and the pressure of having delivered a few nice essays made me feel like I needed to deliver a well-researched, fully-fleshed essay every single night.
So, when I couldn’t—because of course not—I froze up.
Naturally, what began as an exercise against perfectionism became an excuse for it: if a blog didn’t feel like it said something new, fresh, and profound (on a nightly basis), then it wouldn’t get published. Repeat ad nauseum for a month or so.
Now, I’m in the middle of planning my “get back in the saddle” moment: I’m writing 5 new blogs and , and I’m determined to continue writing until the challenge is over. Will I get to 365 blogs? Unlikely. Will I get some good essays in there? I hope so!
But instead of producing 5 blogs, I’ve been revisiting the same blog over and over. Why? Because it’s not the insightful, publication-worthy piece that I had in my head. I’m trying to write a book instead of forcing myself to do the challenging thing and finishing what I started.
So, I’m making a compromise with myself.
Writing a New Deal
When I started, I thought the nightly blog schedule would keep me from getting inside my own head. Turns out I was wrong, so I’ll need to rewrite the rules a bit.
From now on, I’ll write 3+ blogs a week. Once a week, I’ll have the chance to do something ambitious. I’ll allow myself the luxury of time, rewrites, and outlining. Twice a week (or more), I’ll shoot off the cuff. I’ll respond to what I’m reading, unpack a quote I like, or talk about a movie scene I like.
We’ll see how it goes. Hope you’ll stick around.